A Thankful Heart

I went to 2 AA meetings yesterday, the 630am and the 530pm. Today and tomorrow I am going to try to go to meetings with more women so I can try to find a sponsor. I will take my time with that though. There is also a women’s meeting on Saturday my Aunt told me about. I will talk to women and get their numbers and see how they respond and interact. But yesterday I liked the daily reflection: I try to hold fast to the truth that a full and thankful heart cannot entertain great conceits. When brimming with gratitude, one’s heartbeat must surely result in outgoing love, finest emotion that we can ever know. - AS BILL SEES IT, p.37 — My Sponsor told me that I should be a grateful alcoholic and always have “an attitude of gratitude” - that gratitude was the basic ingredient of humility, that humility was the basic ingredient of anonymity and that “anonymity was the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.” As a result of the guidance, I start every morning on my knees, thanking God for three things: I’m alive, I’m sober, and I’m a member of Alcoholics Anonymous. Then I try to live an “attitude of gratitude” and thoroughly enjoy another twenty-four hours of the A.A. Way of life. A.A. Is not something I joined; it’s something I live.

I love that ..attitude of gratitude. I am grateful for so many things, but being alive is at the top of the list. I could have died last October, but I didn’t. I am also so thankful to God that I am sober and in AA. I am grateful that I am able to write my stories and create a non profit foundation to help many others. I am grateful for a loving and supporting family. I am grateful for so many good friends. I am grateful for a beautiful home and car. I am greatful for the opportunity to go to Diet of Hope tomorrow and work hard to get physically healthy! Yesterday I went to see the movie I can only imagine 2 and it was so good. One of the guys drew an X on his wrist every day with a sharpie marker representing that he was grateful to God for another day. I am still grateful for all the bad days I have had including jail time, because now I can tell my story and potentially help a lot of people. Jail was so bad, but it was part of my journey and story. I hope I don’t have to have any more hospital or jail stays. I am like.. God, are you done yet? Can I just continue to live my life and be successful?! Hopefully I can stay on track to be mentallly stable and successful. I have God and my angels, therapy, medications, and a lot of supportive people in my life. I know I can do it!

I woke up in the middle of the night but then went back to sleep and woke up at 630am, exactly when the early meeting starts so I did not have time to get ready and go today. I am grateful for sleeep though. I have a doctor’s appointment at 11:20am and then have to go pick up my medications. I think I will go swim laps at the gym now. I will try to make it to the women’s meeting at 3:30pm and then may still go to the 530pm also. Tonight is trivia night with my friend Kristine at On The Rocks! I am excited for that even though we usually suck. It is so fun though! I hope everyone has a good day! Happy Huuuuump Day!