I deserve love

I have been divorced now for about 12 years and have dated some, but still have not been in a serious relationship. I was in a couple short term relationships, but never got to the point where I was in love with someone or ready to move in together or anything. Right after my divorce when I was still in crisis (mania), I was staying at my Grandma’s house because my house was still being rented out for a couple more months when I moved back from New York. I had a vision that my soaulmate would be Bradley Michael Miller. I was pretty sure he was in the military and just not ready to meet me yet. Fast forward to just last year when my good friend picked me up from jail, I was telling her about this. She said her brother who passed away is Michael Miller. There were also two signs recently about Bradley. My new dentist’s name is Bradley. He is a friend of my brother’s. He is married with kids so is not my soulmate but it’s just cool that my visions are still coming true in a way. There is also another connection to Bradley that is really cool, but for privacy reasons I can’t share it. A few years ago I thought my soulmate was a guy I met in AA. We had become really good friends. And just a year and a half ago, I thought my soulmate was another guy I met at AA, but that did not work out. I lose faith a lot that I am going to find my person. Online dating has been so frustrating and discouraging. I know I just haven’t been ready. I have had to go through some things and tough times. I need to love myself more before I can expect someone to love me. I need to work on my physical health and mental health and really focus on being the best version of myself. I have faith in God and my angels and have faith that my person will find me when the time is right. My person is not ready for me either. They are either out of state still, getting over a divorce, or just not ready. I want to get back involved with NAMI In Our Own Voice and Ending The Silence and do public speaking soon. I want to focus on working out and eating healthy. I am going to the gym today at 10am to swim laps. I want to eventually get a part time job. When I am doing better, love with find me. There have to be good guys out there still. I just kept thinking I am not worthy because I have mental illness, am on mental disability, and am overweight. But I am an amazing person and will do amazing things. My person may not be named Bradley Michael Miller but he’s out there. And in the meantime, I am very okay being single. I am not going to settle. I deserve love!